Title: Four times Hotch got the wrong idea and one time he didnt.
Part: 2/5 "Pants"
Wow, I got some great reviews. Thank you guys so much, I´m glad you like it so far!
Alright, here´s number two, called Pants.
There are some allusions to mature themes, tell me please if that kind of thing changes the rating (I never got that system to be honest...does just talking about something make it worth M?)
This one´s supposed to be funny, too - as opposed to the next ones at least...
Hotch barely suppressed a yawn when JJ launched into her next report about their newest UnSub´s activities.
He immediately felt rude but he was just so terribly tired. Besides, it wasn't like any of the other team members would have noticed it anyways.
The BAU team had just returned from a week long case in Alabama, which had kept them so busy they had barely gotten three hours of sleep a night. It was showing now that they were back at the office, even though they were far from done with the case.
All of them were scattered over the meeting room on their respective chairs looking at least as tired as he. His eyes wandered from Emily and Dave who were looking at JJ with glassy stares, dark circles under their eyes, to Morgan who looked like the sleep deprivation had him at a hair´s width from snapping and yelling at anyone unlucky enough to come near him, to JJ herself, who was just reading out the same sentence twice in a row, blinking furiously.
The only ones who didn't look like they were about to drop were Garcia and Reid, and that only because they had downed at least six cups of coffee this morning. Each of them.
As a result, Reid was practically jumping up and down in his chair, while Garcia kept whispering things in his ear, only to have them both stare at Morgan and giggle.
It made being awake all the more annoying for the rest of them. Especially for Morgan whose eye twitched every couple of seconds whenever he felt their stares on him.
So when Morgan eventually ran out of coffee, no one was surprised to see him push himself up and head for the kitchen, grumbling something indelible.
"Get me some more too, sugar, will you?", Garcia called after him, holding up her empty cup. Hotch was pretty sure Morgan didn't intend on coming back anytime soon; he´d probably doze off on some couch.
He wasn't about to point that out though when Reid jumped up, grabbing Gracias cup.
"I don't think he heard you."; he explained, practically skipping after Morgan into the kitchen.
Thank god, at least there was some quiet now.
There was a metallic noise and Reid heard Morgan curse loudly through the kitchen door that was slightly ajar.
Carefully, he peered in to see Morgan jumping on one foot, shaking his left hand madly and still cursing. He seemed to have dropped the full pot of coffee somehow, getting the hot liquid all over his shirt and hands in the process.
Reid couldn't help but chuckle at the image of him hopping through the room but shut up quickly when Morgan spun around at the sound, glaring at him crossly.
"You okay?", he asked amiably, still too amused to actually sound very worried. He slipped into the kitchen and stepped up to Morgan to inspect the damage.
"No, I'm not okay, Reid!", Morgan hissed, messily tearing at the front of his shirt to get the hot cloth off his skin. He ripped most off the buttons right off with it, tossing the shirt aside with another wave of choice words and turned on the faucet to get some cold water.
Meanwhile, Reid went to pick up the coffee pot from the floor, delighted to find that only half of its content had been spilled. He moved to the sink and was happily refilling his cup when Morgan next to him turned around with wide eyes.
"What the hell Reid?", he yelled unexpectedly, his face as red as the burn marks on his chest: "I´m suffering here and you just stand there….AAH!"
He hadn't gotten to finish the sentence because his sudden outburst had startled Reid so much that the young man jumped and promptly slipped on the wet floor. With a scream he lost his balance, falling forward and spilling more coffee over Morgan's pants as he went down. Now Morgan was screaming, too, grimacing in pain.
"Damnit, Reid!", he gasped, as he felt his lower body burned as well.
After about ten minutes of staring blankly at their blonde liaison, it occurred to the team that neither Morgan nor Reid had come back yet, mostly because Garcia was noisily complaining about being thirsty.
"What, did Reid fall asleep, too, now?", Rossi grumbled, clearly pissed off that he himself had to stay awake.
"I´ll go look for them.", Garcia offered, scampering out the door before anyone could stop her.
Hotch sighed and got up as well. There was no point dragging this out any more with half the team gone MIA.
"Alright, people, let´s get some rest. We´ll talk about the profile tomorrow."
He left the meeting room and followed Garcia, catching up with her after a few steps.
"Found them yet?", he asked.
She shook her head but smiled: "No, but I'm following the scent of coffee black as night. It should lead me straight to them. And even if it doesn't: I've got to think of myself now."
Hotch chuckled lightly, rubbing his burning eyes as he walked. He was about to answer when they heard yelling and shouting coming from the kitchen.
"Sorry! Oh! I'm so sorry, Morgan!", Reid apologized hastily over and over, this time actually distressed by having caused the other man pain.
He pushed himself up from the wet floor by the sink to sit on his knees, arms flailing helplessly through the air while Morgan fumbled with the button of his jeans, trying to yank them off and get cold water on his skin.
"Fuck, Reid!", Morgan swore when he saw the amount of red spots on his lower abdomen: "Now look at what you've done! I won't have children!"
Reid had no trouble inspecting Morgan's skin from where he was kneeling, it was right on eye level. He grabbed a wet towel and pressed it to his friend´s stomach in an attempt to cool the burns. Morgan hissed at the sting, his fingers reflexively digging into Reid´s shoulder.
The young doctor barely acknowledged the tight grip, still torn between guilt and laughter. Both got stuck in his throat when there was a voice from the door, interrupting them.
"Morgan, where's my cof…OH MY…!"
Hotch´s drowsiness was forgotten as soon as Garcia's squeak pierced his ears. He winced, then tried to look past her to see what had startled her so much. What he saw let him doubt whether he had actually fallen asleep after all.
Morgan was standing with his back to the door without his shirt on. One of his hands was struggling to push down his jeans as well while the other was digging into Reid's shoulder. Reid's shoulder which was only level with Morgan´s hips because his head was, too. The young doctor was kneeling on the floor, half covered from their sight by Morgan, his hands apparently pressed to the older man's stomach –if not lower.
Hotch swallowed hardly, forcefully willing himself to close his mouth and blink. He heard Garcia gasp again next to him which had the two agents finally notice them.
As soon as he saw them, Reid blushed furiously and shot to his feet, which unfortunately resulted in him slipping again. He barely managed to get a grip on Morgan's arm to keep from falling to the ground again. Unfortunately the mug in his hand wasn't as lucky.
They all jumped when it shattered on the tiles with an earsplitting noise. Garcia into Hotch and Reid into Morgan.
"Damnit, Reid! You´re a disaster on legs!"; Morgan shouted, trying to avoid stepping on glass.
As annoyed as he sounded, Hotch couldn't help but notice he didn't try to pry the kid off his arm. No, in fact he didn't seem the least bit bothered by the notion of his very male, very shirtless coworker clinging to him tightly.
Hotch forced himself to look away from where Morgan's fingers circled Reid's upper arm, holding him up. Tried to get the mental picture burned into his brain out of his head, before they noticed he had spaced out.
"It wasn't me!", Reid now defended himself as he straightened up and took a step back. He looked down at his shirt in dismay, seeing that it was now also covered in dark stains. With a resignated sigh, he pulled it off like Morgan had, igniting another gasp from Hotch and Garcia at the same time. This was still their work place, wasn't it? Granted they were alone in the kitchen…
Still, all Hotch could do was stare and try to adjust to what it was he had actually seen moments ago. From the slight flush on Derek's face he figured that the agent had at least some idea what they had looked like, even if it had just been an unfortunate misunderstanding. Reid on the other hand, looked equally embarrassed if only because they had totaled the kitchen floor.
"Sorry, Hotch…", he mumbled in embarrassment, wiping his hands on his shirt: "We´ll get that cleaned up, don't worry…"
That wasn't the explanation Hotch had hoped for, even though by now he was pretty sure that there had been nothing going on. If this were more than a misunderstanding Reid wouldn't be able to face him right now, that was for sure.
Still, he wanted to hear it - but sure enough he didn't get to ask either because in that moment the small kitchen got even fuller.
"What are you guys doing in here?", Emily´s voice came from the door, curious as ever.
A second later Hotch felt her peeking over his shoulder and gasp; a gasp that sounded much less shocked than his own and much more enticed.
"JJ!"; she cried excitedly: "JJ! Cancel our tickets for that Chippendales performance. You have to see this!"
Moments later the little room was full of chatter, Emily, JJ and Garcia cheerfully giggling and fawning over the half naked guys who suddenly were all the more embarrassed. Dave had walked over to Morgan after a while, grinning and saying something Hotch couldn't make out over the girls laughter.
"Hotch?", Reid approached him carefully, awkwardly covering his chest with his wet shirt: "You look kind of pale, if you're worried about the mess…"
"No. No, don't worry.", Hotch waved him off after a moment of recollection. He still couldn't seem to pry his eyes of the man's bare collarbone - much less maneuver a coherent thought from his brain to his mouth.
"What…were you doing in here?", he finally managed to ask but didn't get an answer because they were once again interrupted.
"Yeah.", Emily chimed in, wriggling her eyebrows suggestively: "What were you two doing?"
"Ah, come on", Garcia grinned next to her: "You know how much Reid enjoys some strong, black, steamy…"
"We were just getting coffee!", Reid exclaimed, his face the color of a ripe tomato. He glared at the girls warningly but they wouldn't have it.
"Is that so?"; Garcia just wouldn't let up: "Then where is the coffee I was promised?"
Reid hesitated, his gaze wandering back to Morgan's still glistering abs; he shrugged helplessly: "Sorry, if you want it you´ll have to lick it off Morgan."
He was too busy bickering with Garcia to notice Hotch´s jaw fall slack again at his choice of words.
"You mean you left some for me? How generous…", she mocked, sending Reid into another round of embarrassed indignation.
Hotch quietly slipped out of the room, unnoticed by his bickering team mates.
He had a lot of sleep to catch up on.
Right after a long shower.